OH HAPPY JOY JOY!!

Nah..this is gonna be another -_- post.. so leave if you're in a happy chirpy mood because I don't wanna burst your bubble. I mean it.


Aight..I know I should quit and get a better job but then problem is it is out NOT my game to do so.. Maybe this is all just a misunderstanding and maybe, it is just me. Maybe I am giving it a lot of chances. Maybe I am willing to let go of all the bad things that has happened..

Apparently they did not let go.

Half of me says that I don't blame them. Another half of me is thinking that human nature does have this nature of not being able to see other people takin' it easy even if it doesn't kill. And so, I'd probably react the same way man. It's all a matter of lookin' thru their eyes.

What Would Jesus Do sorta thing.

If I were to quit, I will step one ladder down but not quit. Let's just see how it goes because I refuse to look like a loser when I know I am not. To them, I am benefitial.

"...I want you to improve because I want you to handle more. K**** is not the right person to do this. But I have no choice because so far he is the only person I can trust here..(aka best friend for more than 10 years this two, fyi) I feel that you are more suitable to represent the company here in east Malaysia but I need to see improvement so I can offer you more"

..........................

Honestly when he said that, I was feeling empty. Half asleep. Unexcited. I should be estatic, motivated but no, I wasn't. Okay fine, flattered.. but I know he just wants to make K**** happy and shift the pressure on me. Not on him.

I told this him about it and he was soo happy for me and told me to go for it and wished that it will all go well. Little did he know that I am actually not as excited as he is at that moment.

*sigh*

It's a good offer but I have to let go of my life. The life that kept me going. The things that enlightens me and makes ME happy but not them. I don't think much ahead because Life is Short. I have lived on my own terms all this while and it made me ME.

I've offers around but sometimes I believe that I should work with strangers instead of friends. Working with your friends can lead to bitterness and the last thing I want is to lose that lil gift of friendship because friends are the unofficial family that I have around here in this town. So that's why I consider upon the offer but tend to let go off the oppurtunity. As much as I wanted so much to work with/under them, I just couldn't somehow.

Ego? Probably man..

I've seen alot of broken friendships happened because of working together and right now, I know someone is seeing signs of a potential friendship at stake because of work and I've heard enough gossip and backstabbing goin on so I've this fact stuck in my head that it is harsh reality and hard to avoid because of whatever.

I'd be happy if the working environment is like Grey's Anatomy. Minus the scandals and all lah. =P

Hmm, I think this is enough to say. I've a big weekend ahead of me and the thought of my boss being there @ The DUO party is not helping.

I know right! oh my fcuking gawd!! blahhhhh!

I know he'll be xpecting to see how do I go to work this Sunday after the big event. Especially when it comes to TIME of clocking in because they love pickin' on me in that matter. Skanks!! And they know am a night owl on weekends.

I should show up with a major cleavage top on the dot yea?

Oh, and if you stumble upon here because of the link printed in B.Mag, why Hello. Yes this is the club scene photographer all out and nasty. Loves! Am nice bah actually.

It's just that I have a blog and I'd love to screen what I say but the censorship board is just too busy cutting out love scenes. I've tried checkin' in to Heartbreak Hotel but it's always fully booked.

So here I am.